Explaining Death to a Four-Year-Old

This morning I prayed that God would show me the right time and give me the right words to tell Anna Claire about Meme. Otherwise, Larry and I had planned on waiting until this evening to explain Meme's passing. We even had a few books picked out to read with her.

But a car ride changed all of that.

I'm driving down the road and I hear, "Mommy, did Meme want to see me yesterday?" Anna Claire knew I went to Signature yesterday, and that that was why her Daddy picked her up.

I thought to myself, well here's your timing. Tell her now. God give me the words. 

"Well sweetheart, Meme went home to be with Jesus yesterday."

"Did Meme die, Mommy?" she asked.

"Yes baby. She's in heaven with Jesus." I answered.

"Then she can go home after that, right Mommy?"

"No honey, she gets to stay with Jesus forever, and it's the most wonderful, beautful place in the world."

After a few moments she asked, "I can't see her anymore, can I Mommy?"

"No, sweetheart, we can't see her, but she is so happy now to be with Jesus and she's not hurting anymore and she doesn't have to lie in that bed anymore. She is healed now."

Silence.

"Mommy? Did you clean her room yet?"

"Not yet, baby."

"I can help you with that Mommy."

We arrive at The Red Barn and I question if I've said the right things or if what I said will impact her day, positively or negatively. She runs to two of her little friends and gives them big hugs and the three girls begin to laugh and play together.

I drive off in tears, wondering what I was thinking, trying to teach school today. But it ended up being the best possible choice for me. My students were precious and it was a welcome distraction from what would have otherwise been an extremely empty, melancholy day.

This afternoon, I did explain to Anna Claire what a funeral was and gave her an idea of what to expect on Friday. She is excited about not going to school and getting to stay with us. She's also looking forward to the possible food offerings, seeing all of her family, and about getting a new black dress. ;)