Mean Girls...at Age Three?

Three-year-olds can have a mean streak from time to time...my child included.

More often than not, though, Anna Claire is on the receiving end of the hurtful comments and actions. And it breaks my heart as a mom, because I can't stop it or control it.

The most common offense is having other girls tell her, "I don't want to be your best friend" or "I'm not your best friend anymore." Or "I don't want to play with you." These words break her heart, and consequently mine.

Several moms and I discussed this issue at a birthday party last April and realized we weren't alone and were all facing this same issue. We talked to the girls' teacher at the time, Sharna, and we all agreed that when this comment would get made to our girls we would say, "Everyone in the Bunnies class is your friend."

Sharna's tactic worked most of the time, but as Anna Claire is getting older, she is less consoled by the "everyone is your friend" fix. So again, I talked to her teacher today in the Ponies class.

She said she sees it too, and thinks the girls say it because they are mad and don't know what to say so they say, "You're not my friend" because it hurts. Her Ponies teachers also tell the kids they are all friends, encourage being friends, to be kind to everyone, and discourage leaving friends out.

I am hoping this is a faze, and that the girls will move through it quickly.

In the meantime, I see a little girl who almost daily has someone tell her they are not her friend or they don't want to play with her... friends she loves very much. And I don't think the girls saying this are being malicious at all. I just wish I could fix it and feel helpless about the whole thing.

Wanting Mommy's Advice

AC has been asking me for advice at bedtime lately.

Tonight she  told me a story about how she asked a friend to play and they said "no" which hurt her feelings, then asked "What if somebody asks me to play and I don't want to?"

I was so proud of her for asking! She is so sweet to flip the situation around and think of how she might make someone else feel if things were reversed.

My answer: "Try saying 'Maybe later. Thanks for asking me.'" She replied "ok!"

Anna Claire-isms

Anna Claire has certain words, phrases and pronunciations of words that I just love to hear her say and have become so precious to hear that I will be sad when she doesn't say them anymore. Better write them down!

When asked what she is doing or to repeat something she said, she replies, "Nuffing!" (nothing) :)

"I can do it myself!"

"I can get a special treat for that."

"What time is it?" then a few minutes later, "What time is it now?"

"When seeing a friend's baby brother or sister, "I wish I had a baby at my house."

"(Daddy, Chippy, Santa) will be so proud of me!"  - Chippy is our Elf on the Shelf. She's still talking about him and asking about him.

"I don't want to wear shirt with long sleeves. I like short sleeves like Daddy."

When climbing up the stairs, "I can go first."

When licking a lollipop or popsicle, "I can 'look' it!" (she can't say "lick":)

Larry and I take turns putting Anna Claire to bed, every other night. When it's one parent's turn, after saying prayers, she will ask for the other one to come back in and give her more hugs and kisses.

"Mommy and Daddy" by Anna Claire

"Mommy has a ponytail with black hairspray. You have a boo-boo on your arm (right arm). You need lotion for that. I put buttons on your shirt, Mommy. This is Daddy. He has eyes and a ponytail and wots of necklaces!"

Funnies

Fun talks with Anna Claire:
 
Topics of child-led conversations with AC today: migration, oil changes, appendectomies (we read Madeline for the umpteenth time), and which is better: Snickers or Milky Way. She concluded Milky Way is best because "nuts get stuck in my wittle teef."

I want a baby too, Mommy:

Anna Claire has, all of a sudden, starting asking many questions about being a baby and what babies do. I think this has a lot to do with the baby boom among mommies of her friends in the ponies class. "Did I spit all over you when I was baby, Mommy? Did I eat ____ when I was baby? Did I sit on the couch when I was baby?" She also stated her friends had a baby at her house so she wanted one too. She says she wants a girl baby.

Garbage man:
 
Anna Claire has become very curious about the garbage man lately. The past few Thursdays, when she asks what tomorrow is and I respond, "Friday," she will inevitably come back with either "Tomorrow is treasure box day at the Red Barn" OR  "The garbage man comes tomorrow!" 

He came up several times in conversation today: Does he have mustache, Mommy? What he look like, Mommy? Is he coming inside our house, Mommy? Does he come while Daddy is taking his shower?

New Year's Eve

I always assumed that as a parent of a young child, you would have two choices on New Year's: to ring it in with them, or to get a sitter, go out, and feel guilty for leaving them. Well, this year, we were offered the rare opportunity to do both.

Love our friends who were so thoughtful to invite us to a cool, hip NYE party for parents and kiddos! It was such a neat set up.

At the party, we were downstairs with yummy drinks, jello shots and tamales they had shipped from LA. The kiddos were upstairs with a sitter who actually works at the daycare where we all take our kids. They had a ball playing Legos and the boys other toys, playing with NYE favors, and watching Toy Story. Having two of her favorite girl friends there made it even more special for Anna Claire.

Anna Claire was so excited to go to the party. It gave us an opportunity to talk about NYE, why we celebrate it and what happens with her. She spent all day prior to the party talking about it, making drawings for her host, and deciding what to wear. Once we told her the boys would be wearing their jammies, she immediately opted for her Disney princess nightgown, and asked for her hair to be in an updo like Mommy's.

It was so great to get out and spend time with grown-ups. Larry and I rarely get out and just have fun. This let us do it and also watch AC take part in the fun.

The day after she was still hyped about it, wearing her NYE tiara, beads, and blowing her party horn all day long. We also celebrated with a tradition we started last year: spraying silly string all over each other. :)